Recorded May and June 2022 at Eugenia Apartment 102, Southeast Portland, Oregon.
Music and lyrics written by Kevin Shapiro with the exception of track 9 “Seasons Change” (music and lyrics written by Pierce Kelly Valenzuela with supplemental lyrics by Kevin Shapiro); and track 13 “Buskers Jingle Jangle” (some lyrics were written by others without their consent).
Musicians (recorded elsewhere)
Alex Vo (pedal steel)
JD Erickson (saxophone)
Ross McKinney (electric guitar)
Domenico Franco (electric guitar)
Jay Ringer (melodica)
Mixed and mastered by John Fauler
1. Boondoggle
Boon·dog·gle /ˈbo͞onˌdäɡəl/ Noun: work or activity that is wasteful or pointless but gives the appearance of having value. Verb: waste money or time on unnecessary or questionable projects. I always thought “boondoggle” was a joke word, made up by Davis Torgerson and his friends in Minnesota. Turns out it has a definition, and that definition happens to describe my music, and most of the things I do, life, really. It also has a great syllable structure and rhyming opportunities: boondoggle, blue goggle? to toggle? Anyways, so I wrote this song. I was gonna call it “Nollie Front Hurricane” but my critically acclaimed record execs said that was too long.
It ain’t where there's lightning
it’s when there’s thunder
It ain't the game
rather the over or the under
If I was to advise
what I’d tell ‘em
Give away the flowers
while they’re still around to smell ‘em
Won’t think once or twice
before leavin’ the home family farm
This old world’s got more up its sleeve
than a dirty arm
You’ll find your head itchin’
for a hand on the label
and your lips on the bottle
You barrel down your night
‘Til you wind up in a boondoggle
Your foods only colder
once it’s sittin’ on the table
Won’t you tell me now
instead of waiting until later
Your beer’s only warmer
once it’s out the frigerator’
You’re placin’ orders
after you paid her
Won’t think once or twice
before sounding the alarm
This ole world’s got more up it’s sleeve
than a dirty arm
You’ll find your head itchin’
for a hand on the wheel
n your foot on the throttle
You barrel down your life
‘Til you find you’re in a boondoggle
A boondoggle
2. Shoestring
The minute you think you know something, you don't. The minute you think you don’t know something, you do. Relationships are weird like that. I was trying to wrap this song up and the shoestring holding my bar lamp in my room randomly broke, spilling my wine all over my desk, drawings, and floor. I guess that's what she meant by “were hangin on by a thread?”
I thought I’d known by then
but I hadn't
That i didn't by now
but I do
I guess that's the funny thing
about life and livin’
She told me she’d been worried
where I’d been n where I was
Like i'm hooked n booked
n on parole
I guess that's the funny thing
about love and women.
I'm gettin kinda worried
where my mind’s been
Worried that i haven't been lately at all
‘Cause this is like the last time times ten
But then again
math’s never been my forte
She shut of my light
well really it fell
Spilled on my desk
all over my floor
What could I expect
when it was held up by a shoestring
& never mind askin’ how we are
or how our day’s been
All this hectic
technology and then
Now you go n tell me
that were held up by a shoestring
N im gettin kinda worried
where my heart’s gone
Ever since I stamped
and shipped it to you
You got me singin’ yet another sad song
When all along
A little smile will do
You got me singin’ yet another sad song
Them ole shoestring blues
3. Who Cares
( pedal steel: Alex Vo )
I graduated college and moved home and started telemarketing ‘cause I didn't get the job at the grocery store I applied to. My degree was not in telemarketing or grocering. They made us re-write and study a grafty sales pitch on a yellow legal pad. I started writing a song to my lady instead. “You make me wanna go to the river, you make me wanna go to the lake, your heart makes my heart beat harder, well aware my heart could break” ..real cheesy stuff. It took me forever and the song sucked. Here's a song about that song. I wrote it in ten minutes after an attempt to end a fight with her one night. I’ve always hated lined paper.
I remember a time that I wrote you a song
and it felt so right
Seems all week long I worked on it
both day and night
Love’s funny it consumes me baby
and it occupies all of my head
The day came and I sang it for you
that's when you said
Find someone who cares
Find someone who cares
You said it's easy to do
they're everywhere
Find someone who cares
Lookin’ back now that wasn't the first time
I sang it for you
I sent you a shitty voice memo version
I recorded while drinkin’ a brew or two a few
You couldn't hear the words, and that's my bad
but I gotta say it broke my heart
But lookin back now
aint nothing compared to today
my world fell a-fuckin-part
Find someone who cares? Shit
Find someone who cares
You say it's easy to do
they're everywhere
So who cares
I remember that time that I wrote you that song
now it don’t seem right
Seems all day long I been thinkin’ bout it
well into the night
But love’s funny it consumes me baby
and it occupies all of my head
It's got me back here lying entwined
n flippin’ channels in a queen size bed
With someone who cares
Someone who cares
It's easy to do
they're everywhere
Fuck, who cares
Find someone who cares
Find someone who cares
What's new?
You’re everywhere
So who cares
4. Do As The Romans Do
( saxophone: JD Erickson )
Roman was a local legend who left the planet too soon. I didn't know him nearly as well as I'd like to have known him, but I've been heavily influenced by folks that were heavily influenced by him. If you want good stories about Roman busking with a saxophone, telling passersby that they are getting a free show by a graduate and sarcastically exaggerating the return on investment one receives from paying for music school, go ask Eric Roebuck. He's got a ton of them. I wrote this as a poem and I didn’t want it to rhyme but unfortunately there were rhymes that revealed themselves.
Can't live with it
Can’t always trust myself
when I think I know where I'm going
and I don't
Ain't nothing more daunting than
being well willing and
Telling myself I'll refrain
When I won’t
They got the
Best in the diocese
Better yet parish
It's like Christmas morning every night
Stand on the fire
It burns thru your souls
I'll never go again but if I do here’s why
I tend to see it clearer
only once its behind me like
Bright lights in my rear view mirror that blind me.
Oh tomorrow
Oh manana,
Is over before it begins,
Endless with no start.
It's a dose of doughnuts n diabetes by dinner
Til see you later is goodbye
It's hard to bargain
With a vending machine
It’s monday morning calling on a saxophone Saturday night
And now all the cigarettes
Are nine miles long and lit with
A match made in heaven
By someone listening,
Not waiting to speak,
Lost n found as concrete
And down on earth
For what it's worth
They do as the romans do
They do as the romans do
They do as the romans do
5. Harmonica Hound
Here's a song about the biggest dog I've ever seen, Sangria. Her original name was Paris and she was intended to be mild mannered, sit calmly in handbags, things like that, but that ole clap of thunder chose a pirate's life from the get go, navigating from behind the handlebars, on the bow and the center console. She liked to party, running around peoples ankles and biting any scallywags foolish enough to pick her up. She led a restless life, the only time both of her eyes were closed was when she’d howl at the harmonica. Some say if you play a harp on a warm lonely river night, when the donkeys are all asleep and the moon is half eclipsed by the fingery desert peaks, you can still hear that old sea dog howl.
I once knew a dog
she was named after alcohol
She wasn't like any other dog that I’d met at all
But what they had in pounds
She more than made up for in movin’ around
She been to town
and two steps from fallin’ off of Sahalie Falls.
Her name was Sangria
but she was more like the whiskey type
Where them rottweilers barkin
this chihuahua would bite
Harmonica hound
Leave you bleedin' for leavin' the ground
You lookin’ down
Turn around
she ain't out of mind but she’s out of sight
6. Man's Best Friend
I threw this song out for 7 years, thinking it was a dud. Then I thought how true it still was. I threw it out because it rips off a rap song that doesn’t seem to belong in a folk song. Then I thought of what great American songwriters Hitman, Kurrupt & Dr Dre are. I like doing this thing where I'll move away from my closest friends and family but maintain the relationships in complete denial of my own leaving. I think that's what this song is about; that and specifically getting a flat tire in Las Cruces.
I got this friend of mine
we hang out all the time
Whenever we find ourselves
in the same town
But that aint always the case
so when it is we purchase a case
And we crack one after each hollow aluminum sound
He went east to Texas
I went north to Oregon
Our four wheels, they got us where we needed to go
But with each mile we drove apart
our friendship seemed to grow stronger
A feelin’ I know I'm lucky enough to know.
This just is one of them occasions
just a couple friends doin it right
Take a bullet or a knife
when you both know you're in it for life
And when it all boils down you're gonna find in the end
That a dog is a man's best friend
And it’d be a shame to have a friend like that
and not have his back until the end
So it's true you're my friend
but that aint how it’s always been
I suppose I spent those first 6 years alone
But summer trips to the lake
and bein’ there when momma passed away
Created this bond as strong as stone
We both played our hands at love
it taught us the importance of
Never lettin’ anybody get between you and me
Always on the other side of the line
when the sun down seem to shine
Through the good times and the bad
you’re never missin’ a beat
This just is one of them occasions
just a couple friends doin it right
Take a bullet or a knife
when you both know you're in it for life
And when it all boils down you're gonna find in the end
That a dog is a man's best friend
And it’d be a shame to have a homie like that
and not have his back until the end
Shit man ain't it strange
how some shit never changes
Leave us barefoot in the rain
we'll still crack a smile
And when we're both old n grey
n still aint ran out of shit to say
To one another guess we’ll laugh and talk
of our decades of runnin’ wild
Yeah we’ll laugh and talk
about gettin’ a flat in Las Cruces
and crack a smile
This just is one of them occasions
just a couple friends doin it right
Take a bullet or a knife
when you both know you're in it for life
And when it all boils down you're gonna find in the end
That a dog is a man's best friend
And even after all the crazy shit we’ve gotten in
if I could do it over I’d do it again
7. María
( electric guitar: Ross McKinney )
The lovely María is everyone's favorite. She makes the world's best margarita and she’s your best friend's best friend. She lived in Hawai’i once, and I'm assuming they have statues of her over there. One time I was in the desert, swaying over a bush and wishing María was with us when this moany melody overcame me, so I recorded it on my pocket screen. The next morning I listened and instantly knew it was a piece of shit but I was determined and pushed through that feeling, picked up my guitar, and turned that piece of shit into a piece of shit with chords.
María
(a bunch of times reminiscent how one sounds when urinating in a bush and thinking of a great friend that they wish was at the campfire and bottle they came from)
She’ll drink you under the table
and over the line
She knows all your favorite people
from here to Hawai’i
She’ll do it, n soon you will too
without asking why
She’ll drink you under the table
and over the line
There's something
about
Marí
She’s servin’ up blended up weekends
spicy with lime
She’ll fill your soul, ‘cause her cup is half full
all the time
She’ll do it, n soon you will too
without asking why
She’ll fill up, your soul ‘cause her cup
is half full all the time
There’s something
About
Oh there’s somethin
About
María
(a bunch more times reminiscent how one sounds when they are done urinating in a bush and returning to the campfire and bottle they wish their friend was at)
8. Founding Father
Remember 2020? Wild. Everyone wanted to cancel everyone. I was passing my time by designing a hypothetical open-air museum for discarded confederate statues. The figures would hang upside down, chained to the ceiling and rainwater would periodically fill the space covering their heads. A bit morbid, sure, but I felt we needed to metaphorically drown them, simply discarding them seemed too easy. Anywho, I asked myself if the founding fathers should be subject to this waterboarding and was indifferent. They had some fucked up ideas, but they had some great ideas as well. I wondered what they would think of the current polarized sociopolitical climate, and imagined our country as a family. Instead of political parties there's two kids, the obnoxious daughter, the woke son, and the wise but erroneous father who is having trouble guiding and learning from his extremist children. Everyone has their points, some correct, some not-so-much, but in the end it pays to listen to everyone, take it in, then challenge your own opinions through this virtuous activity called “thinking.” I think that's what this song is about. Or maybe it's just a song about a horse. Whatever.
I can lead my horse to water
But I can’t make em drink
Eventually tho
a little later
He's gonna ask for a drink
He’ll be like “please?
Oh maybe?
Oh thank you.
Oh baby!”
I can lead my horse to water
one way or another tho
That horse is gonna drink
I can lead my son n my daughter
But on their own they’re gonna think
It don't matter that
I’m their founding father
On their own they’re gonna think
They’ll be like “you did what?
To whom?
Wait, where n when
n my god why!?”
It’ll be worse than that time
she crashed that brand new car I bought her
Sent me straight to the shrink
Soon she’ll be red and she’ll be fighting with her brother
I’m gonna cringe at the sound
One says that “this privilege
is just mutually exclusive”
to the other who's been draggin’ me down
I'm thinking all of my bliss
is ignorance
I hoped and prayed I’d die
before it ever came to this
But there that ole lady’s
steady fightin’ with her brother
and I cringe at the sound
I buy him these blues but I don’t know why I bother
He feels real pretty in pink
He asks me “What the fuck’s the problem
with a guy who fucks another
and who doesn’t give a fuck what you think?”
I tell him it’s wrong
“Oh It’s wrong?
Well maybe it’s right
n maybe that’s why
when you buy me these blues
dad you be dumpin' every dollar
right down your sink”
So I can lead myself to water
n not take a drink
I set there on the banks
by the water
caught in a think
I'll be like “hmmmmm
oh
ugh
well maybe that's right”
I find myself settin’ here
wonderin’ by the water
I’m caught in a think
9. Seasons Change ( Pierce Kelly Valenzuela )
When I was living at Laconia, Pierce was living on the couch at Laconia. I’d have supper ready for him when he got off work, chile rellenos, it was beautiful. Anyways, we played all of our songs together and we’d bounce ideas off one another. One morning I was walking past the living room (aka Pierces room) and heard this unfamiliar progression coming from the couch. “What the fuck is that?!” I asked. Pierce replied “Just this little thing I've been messing around with.” I was blown away that he wrote it and said "That's the best song ever.” Flash forward a year or so to July at the lake, Pierce couldn't make it so I was summoning his spirit by playing his song and, caught up in missing my pal, I inserted unsolicited lyrics which seemed to sing themselves, I'll never know if Pierce approves of these unsolicited changes, the only things I do know is that 1: he does this song much better, and 2: its the best song ever.
Sometimes you’re cold
Sometimes you’re hot
Sometimes you’re gettin’
just to see what you got
You sing the rock
other times you sing the blues
wait for good news to
pass on through
Seasons change
Ain’t always winter when it rains
You can ask your questions to the wind
By summer
your answers will come round again
*Sometimes you’re here
Sometimes you’re not.
Sometimes I feel like
You’re all I got
I sing the rock
Other times I sing these blues
Whole time through
Waitin’ for good news
Seasons change
Ain’t always winter when it rains down
Ask your questions to the wind pal
by summer
the answers will come round
again
They’ll come round
again.*
Sometimes you’re cold
Sometimes you’re hot
Sometimes you’re gettin’
just to see what you got
You sing the rock
Other times you sing the blues, as your
Waitin’ for good news
To pass on through
Seasons change
Ain’t always winter when it rains
Ask your questions to the wind
By summer, the answers will come round again
And again, and again, and again, and again
the answers will come round again
*unsolicited liberties taken in the space between the asterisks*
10. Where Do We Go From Here
( electric guitar: real brother Domenico Franco )
Going through a break up is tough, it seems like there's a waterfall ahead that you can't escape. No, not that, cause that's something. It seems more bleak than that. It's more like that scene in the Truman show where he reaches the wall at the edge of the ocean. Bleak and confusing at the time, but there's a whole lot more beyond that wall. Tony Robbins told me that.
That woman that love
Stronger than any ole god above
Well she's every damn perfection I could ever dream of
I must admit am pretty happy
I grew a little older and I think she did too
Well you wouldn't believe the feelings that our hearts can brew
She can lock me in a cage, take me to the moon
And she doesn't need to use her hand to slap me
We’re sittin here singin “here comes the sun”
Livin’ every weekend like some bandits on the run
Spendin’ every dollar on havin’ fun
Never askin’ “where do we go from here?”
At Colter Wall you woulda wore your corduroys
It was the kind you didn't really have to dance to enjoy
You’re probably thinkin’ there was girls it was just us boys
Just ‘cause I’m smilin’ doesn’t mean I’m really happy
I thought that at the office you'd be outta my head
That I'd be focused in on something far away but instead
I’m steady thinkin’ bout you baby n so that's what I said
and now I got my colleagues starin’ at me
‘Cause we were sittin’ there singin’ “here comes the sun”
Livin every weekend like some bandits on the run
Spendin’ every dollar on havin’ fun
Never askin’, “where do we go from here?”
Now I'm sittin’ here thinkin’ “here comes the rain”
I don't care that it brings me all the flowers in my picture frames
I got this head full of guilt ‘cause I know you’re probably feeling the same
Along with all these memories I hold so dear
So dear, where do we go from here?
Where you gonna go from here?
Where do I go from here?
Where do we go from here?
When I had that woman that love
Stronger than any ole god above
Every damn perfection I could ever dream of
and I must admit was pretty happy
I grew a little older and I think she did too
Well you wouldn't believe the feelings that our hearts could brew
She could lock me in a cage, take me to the moon
And she didn't need to use her hand to slap me
11. 11:11
Once you're through the breakup, you're beyond the wall, and everythings bright again. Bright until you drink alone thinking of shoulda woulda coulda's. Sometimes you gotta give yourself a nice lonely reminisce cry. Cry and cry and then stop fucking crying and laugh about something. This song is about the part right before you “stop fucking crying.” The part where things like writing a cringey song about 11:11 sound like a good idea.
Sittin’ blue
Thinkin’ of you
Wonderin’ if you know i’m thinkin’ of you
I’m through with two from earlier so this one makes a few
sittin’ round thinkin’ of you
Sittin’ thinkin’
Sittin’ drinkin’
Thinkin’ of you
11:11
wishin’ on you
If I had my ideal I would here with you
A couple hearts smiling ‘cause of feelings that are true
But the truth of the matter is I don't know how we would do
I‘m sittin’ round thinkin’ of you
Sittin’ thinkin’
Sittin’ drinkin’
Thinkin’ of you
It’s 11:11
I'm wishin’ on you
Well the worst of my pain ain’t harbored on my end
Hallucinatin’ memories my lover and my friend
I meant it when I told you I would love you to the end
I get this monkey wrenched heart when I get to wonderin’
If you’re sittin’ thinkin’
Sittin’ drinkin’
Thinkin’ of me
11:11
Are you wishin’ on me?
Sittin’ thinkin’ like I’m
Sittin’ drinkin’
Thinkin’ of you
11:11
Are you wishin' on me?
12. East Portland Skyline
I couldn't fit everything, some honorable mentions are as follows: Monday nights at the Craft Factory with Johnny and Elvis, Tuesday nights at Atlantis Underground in the winter, Wednesday morning Kings Harvest drive thru and Wednesday nights at Eastburn, Thursday nights with Rachel at Momoyama, Friday nights with Zach at the ramp featuring Old German, Saturday night dance parties at City Girl Corner, Sunday Mornings at Paradox cafe and Sunday nights at the Laurelthirst Pub. What do you mean “from a rooftop… who’s Todd Snider? Lord little resurrected baby Jesus please don't let O’bryant Plaza go the way of the 10th and Alder carts, it’s not their fault they are on the west side!
East Portland? Shit
Were livin' in a dream world over here
Moss so thick on the trees out front
you can't even see your neighbor
Maybe that's why they're all so friendly
Friendly at least til they see California plates
That's when they exercise their right
to write a citizen's parking ticket
I'd suggest riding a bicycle
Bikes don't require stopping at stop signs, or license plates
Right-of-way
Like most locals, we just moved here
or just moved back rather
As the saying goes:
"Your hometown isn't necessarily where you grew up
it's where you spent your last thousand dollars"
and we've got six rent checks under our belt
Locals
although the real Oregonians seem salty when we say that
But fuck it
let's go play some billiards
A broken clock may be right twice a day
but the broken pool table down at the Sandy Hut
is free all night long
We got the best coffee shops east or west of the Mississippi
and for that reason, we make our coffee at home
Tuesdays: Helium Comedy Club. Thursdays: Johnny Franco
wherever the fuck he is
Some say it's the rain that drove 'em out of Laurelhurst park
but I know it was the mud
I mean, we like it wet, and it rains a lot in Brazil
Our bars might not stay open as late as New York
but they'll serve a full food menu til close
A roadside neighborhood bar
like My Father's Place, the Cat's Paw or the Good Foot
I'm talkin' drunken dimly lit brussels sprouts on a 1am bar stool
hold the salt
And if those are closed, there's always Tik-Tok Cafe
B-Y-O-R-N
They'll supply the biscuits and gravy, but after hours
you gotta bring your own red wine
And night or day, it's a dog walker's paradise
If you're not standing in a park, walk another block
Just clean up after your canine, will ya?
But even if you don't
you'll probably get the benefit of the doubt
We try to keep an open mind
and the judgements to a minimum
We also try to keep a rain jacket handy
not an umbrella
The rest of the country probably thinks we're crazy
and that may be true
But it's not like we live on the other side of the river or something
It's the Will-AM-ette dammit!
I don't know what's goin' on over there
You hear Mary's moved?
Jesus
Not Sassy's tho
Sassy's stays put while the arson fires burn all around her
And as the skyline rises one apartment building after another
she's a humble reminder
of just how low east Portland is
13. Buskers Jingle Jangle
(melodica: Jay Ringer)
“Give em all of my hey hi howdy’s” ..certain phrases warrant building a song around and Jesse’s full of em. She and I sat at the waterfront trying to figure out what the “hey hi howdy” song is about when we saw none other than Jay Ringer, sitting there behind the keys, trumpet-busking for hours, pulling all these songs out of nowhere. It takes a lot of work to shake all those aces out of your sleeve, obviously the great buskers like Jay have put the work in. The way my dad always said it was “if you want me to pull a rabbit out of a hat, i'm gonna need a rabbit and a hat.” After stealing that from pops I stole the quip “don't go anywhere, but if you do, give us money before you leave” from the professional entertainer himself Johnny Franco, certainly he has a few to spare, he’s a professional. So to recap, this song is stolen from Jesse, Billy and Johnny, without asking. I will not be asking their permission to give them credit either.
If you want me to pull a rabbit
Out of a hat
I'm gonna need a rabbit
And a hat
Don't go anywhere
But if you do
Give us money before you leave
Give ‘em all of my “hey hi howdy’s”
Them late mornin’ n early night rowdys
Hey! Hi
Howdy
Now don't go anywhere
But if you do
Give us money before you leave
My buskin is more than a habit
A black top hat, a big white rabbit
It’s a way to make a livin
Shit, you gotta eat
This magic isn’t free
It costs an optional fee
I got this bucket next to me
I ain't beggin’ but please
Give us money before you leave
Give us money before you leave
many thanks to: Pierce & Jerry Valenzuela n the rest for obvious reasons, Red Kia Soul, Bill & Matt Shapiro for the whole teach me how to play guitar thing, Paige Bella, the Voice Memos app on which this album was recorded, Corey “CK Waverider” Kaiser & Meagan Isbell for the world's best broken guitar and for being a buncha Surfer Wannabes Endlessly Loving Life, Todd Snider, uncle Rudy Mosqueda, Tiffany Vivian Chhum Le for most of the songs, John Prine, Alex “dw Snake Bite” Vo, Kyara and Kalvin Adams for their enthusiastic stage providing, Mr. Fan for finding me a guitar in Yushan Town, Ken “We Are Not Tadao Ando” Chen, Ryan Townley for showing us how to do it the right way, Randy Newman, Jonathan Richman, Shel Silverstein, Austin “Dude Fuckman” Leong for the dirt naps and finding the joy in life's inconveniences, Oscar DePaz for saving my life I think, Eric Roebuck, Parc Crecelius, Eli Peters for pouring his soul out of his harp and into my text messages, the lovely María Reed, Doc Pitello & Anson Ditt for fixing up the best broken guitar in the world, Madison Fowlie, John from 202, everyone at the Atlantis Underground, Kendal Lujan, The Craft Factory, The East Burn, The Porch of the Terlingua Trading Company, Johnny Franco and his Real Brother Dom for the shenanigans and the Sheri’s, Ross McKinney, Jessemin Cain, Jay & Coco Ringer, Mickey or Mikey depending on where you meet him, J.D. Erickson, John Fauler & anyone who has eaten breakfast at Tik Tok Cafe after 2 am.
Lastly, thank you, for listening to the album, and for reading these onliner notes.
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